Box number 838911571335 is sitting in a FedEx building waiting for me to get her today. At least I hope so. I almost lost her today at 9:07 AM when she was re-enumerated and assigned to return to the Arizona she came from. After a few frantic calls to FedEx, I talked them into holding my box for one more day. Lets hope that inertia, or the lack their of, wins out over FedEx's swift and efficient transportation system.

I have been foiled in getting this box of mine because I was helping a friend of mine haul his boxes from his old house to new one. My weekend was consumed by hauling his house innards across four states. (Let me remind you that this is the East coast we are talking about, one quick nap and you'll find that you completely missed a state.)

The move was actually was pretty fun. Good people, not too much stuff, and I got to drive the car. I wish the best of luck to Andrew, as he and his good friend start their very own design company, Rubber Steak. It looks like I may be heading up the web side of things, so you will probably hear more of this non-edible meat product line in the future.

But nevermind all that now. There must be something on your mind right now. What is in the box you ask?

Tartans!

We all love tartans. And if your last name is Allan or Allen—like most of my readers—there is now an easy one-stop shop for all your tartan supplies. Give thanks to my skilled mom for stepping up for all us Allens/Allans who never had anything to wear anything on tartan day.

Celebrate today and check out www.allentartan.com and www.allantartan.com. If I get the box today, then I'll be ready to take orders. Cross your fingers...